Piled as High as an Elephant's Eye - Part I

My teammates/sisters and I were enjoying a nice lunch together. One, married for three years, asked, "At what point in the relationship do you just get your spouse to get rid of his stuff?" I forget the exact wording, but it doesn't matter. What does matter is that I refrained from yelling out, "THREE YEARS AGO!" But, I suppose that would not be starting a relationship on the right foot.

However, this discussion of organization vs. piling has been a point of conversation between Caveman and me. I am an organizer. It came from years of moving from air base to air base as a kid, deciding what it was I wanted badly enough to be shipped 8,000 miles. On the other hand, Caveman is both a piler and a collector. Newspaper articles and notes are placed in specific piles on the floor of our basement. There they begin to collect dust and resemble a home for a colony of rats. Once, I confronted Caveman with a receipt for one item - dog food.
"What's this?" I began.
"A receipt. I meant to put it with my other receipts."
"But why save it at all? As much as we love the dog, the IRS frowns on claiming her as a dependent." We both laughed. The receipt went but the other 9999 did not. Too bad I don't have a witty remark for each of those. But then, there'd be nowhere for the rats.

Caveman collects things that he finds at garage sales and estate sales - a tradition, seemingly, passed down through the males in his family. Among other things, our basement is currently home to a large massage table - the kind only found in chiropractic offices. It oscillates for stretching the muscles. It would be nice to use, but papers are piled on top of it.

Caveman does respect the fact that our entire way of living cannot be consumed in this manner, and so his stuff is relegated to the basement. And while I may not value his junk in the same way he does, I do value the the heart behind every treasure. Each piece is brought home with the same enthusiasm as a bludgeoned mastadon or a speared fish. It is his way of showing that he has gone past the hunting stage to the gathering stage.

One teammate made me realize, however, that it must have been women who invented fire. I am not above setting his things aflame - to make room for the newest stuff.