Yahoooooo! Spring Break has begun! I celebrated Friday night by promptly spewing the contents of my stomach (not recommended as part of the Weight Watchers Plan). Everything from the previous 18 hours came back "up" to haunt me. The ghosts of a birthday cupcake and a slice of pepperoni pizza from lunch seemed to taunt me from the Great Beyond (i.e. the bottom of the commode):
Double, double toil and trouble,
Acids burn and stomach bubble.
Fillet of a salmon sauted not broiled,
In the stomach bubbled and boiled.
Toe of frog and eye of newt,
Next time eat a piece of fruit.
Chicken's leg and buffalo wing
Will wake you up and make us sing . . .
Double, double toil and trouble,
Acids burn and stomach bubble.
To make matters worse, I have TMJ problems. During the first upheaval, I began having problems with my jaw. I guess you could say I was "locked and loaded."
What bothers me the most is that it had to happen after school got out. Had it happened the previous day, I could have had an extra day off. At the very least had it happened during the day on Friday, I could have had some fun. You would just have to imagine some kid's t-shirt
ala Jackson Pollack. Parent complaint? I could say that they were interfering with my right to artistic expression. What better way to say, "You're not doing your work to the best of your ability," than a vomit-stained article of clothing!
The important thing is that I'm feeling better. Nothing says Spring Break like some tongue-in-cheek humor.
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1 comment:
1. Seems that you DO like poetry. Just crappy poetry.
2. You must be MUCH better to
A. Make all those jokes
B. Order butter braids.
3. But I am really sorry that you went through the heaving.
4. And the TMJ- hope it resolves itself SOON.
5. I think you are taking neither Shakespeare nor Jackson Pollack seriously enough.
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